Tempting the Deputy Page 17
She bit into her lip, looked away from him, the stinging tears threatening to turn what was already a bad melodrama into a total catastrophe.
How had it come to this? Did he really want her to spell it out for him? All the reasons why she was so wrong for him? List all her bloody faults and inadequacies.
“You want to know what I think?” he said.
She shook her head. She didn’t want to know what he thought.
He touched her cheek with chilly fingers, and forced her face round to his.
“I think you’re scared.”
“Of course I’m scared,” she spluttered. “I’m bloody terrified. I don’t want to feel like this. I don’t want to love you. And I don’t want you to love me. Because I’ll muck it all up and then we’ll both be miserable.”
A slow smile curved his lips. “Why would you muck it up?”
Why was he smiling? Hadn’t he heard what she’d said?
Her frustration spiked, her temper burning through at least some of the fear.
“Because that’s what I do, Logan. Haven’t you figured it out yet? I don’t stick. I don’t settle. I don’t have relationships.” Her teeth started chattering again, but it wasn’t from the cold this time, it was from the earthquake of emotion pouring through her body. “I meet guys. Sometimes I screw them. And then I move on.” He was still smiling at her. Had he gone deaf as well as blind? “You don’t understand that because you’re not like that. You’re brave, and bold and strong and true—inside and out. And you’ve never run away from anything in your whole life.”
Instead of saying anything, he simply grasped her shoulders and dragged her into his body. Pressing his lips against her hair, he banded his arms around her.
She stiffened in his arms. She couldn’t take the comfort he offered. Not again. She didn’t deserve it. But then he began to talk against her hair, as his hands rubbed her back.
“A while back you told me you wished you could brand my pop for what he did to me. Do you remember that?”
She nodded, the unshed tears making her throat hurt at the memory of that beautiful day.
“Well, right about now,” he continued, “I wish I could drop-kick your dumb, useless parents into the middle of next week for you.”
She jerked back. “Why?”
“Because they made you think you’re not worth anything. And you are, Charlotte. You’re worth so much. You’re worth everything to me.”
“But how can you think that, when I’m such a coward?”
He touched a finger to her lips to stop the flow of words, of recriminations.
“You think I’m not scared too?” he said. “I am. I’m terrified. I know what it’s like to love someone and then lose them. I thought I could anesthetize myself from ever having to feel that pain again by holing myself up at the Double T and never looking for anything more. But then you came along with your smart mouth and your sexy moves and your compassion and determination. And you made me see that what I had wasn’t living, it was existing. You made me want more, Charlotte, so much more. And that more is you.” He cupped her face in his hands, all the love he felt for her plain on his face. Her teeth stopped chattering, the warmth suffusing her whole body, like lava flowing from a volcano that had been dormant for far too long.
“I’m still scared though,” she said.
“Me too,” he said. “So what? You really want to miss out on all the good stuff we could have just because you’re scared?”
“But, Logan, what about the future? I completely freaked out over the pregnancy test. And you said you’d be happy either way. You’re the sort of guy who will want to have children, a family. What if I’m never ready to do that?”
“Charlotte, we’ve been together four weeks. I’ll probably want to have kids one day. I guess. I’d love to see you all fat and round with my baby in your belly,” he teased.
“But…” she began.
“Hush now,” he murmured. “But what I want more is to see the Double T become what it was always meant to be. What it was before my mom passed. I want to see it become a home again.”
The wistful tone made her heart ache.
“It would be a great place to bring up kids…” he added. “But if you’re sure that’s not what you want. I can reconsider. Are you sure you don’t want to have kids? Ever?”
He’d turned the tables on her. And she didn’t have an answer. Because with Logan, everything was different. Hadn’t a part of her almost been disappointed when the stick had stayed negative? Not because she wanted to get accidentally pregnant after four weeks with him—but because the idea of having children with Logan felt…well, possible.
“No I’m not,” she answered. “I’m not sure of anything anymore.” Except how much I love you.
“Then what are we arguing about?”
“I don’t know,” she said, the smile slow and a little painful, but there nonetheless.
Cupping her shoulders he looked into her face, his own smile both sexy and sure. “Then how about we go home now? Because I’m about to freeze my nuts off. And I’ve still got to explain to Sheriff Walton why I stole my own squad car.”
She chuckled.
Home. It was such a simple word. But one she’d never fully understood until this moment when she felt for the first time as if she had somewhere to belong.
“Yes, please,” she said.
He whooped, lifting her off her feet and swinging her around.
She laughed, his joy infectious, as he planted her back on her feet.
He clasped her face in cold hands and covered her mouth with his. His tongue was hot and avid, and demanding, his body strong and true and hers. All hers, as she kissed him back with all the happiness and hunger in her heart, the peaks of Copper Mountain shadowing the snowy landscape, and watching over them like a benevolent giant.
What were you thinking, you ninny? You’re not going to mess this up. Not now you’ve finally found a home… In Logan Tate’s arms.
The End
The Men of Marietta Series
When there isn’t enough money to make Harry’s House a functional afterschool center, the Montana First Responders decide they need to step up, and really turn up the heat. The Men of Marietta Calendar is created with pages filled of sexy guys willing to do just about anything for a great cause….
Book 1: Tempting the Deputy by Heidi Rice
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Book 2: Flirting with Fire by Kate Hardy
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Book 3: Daring the Pilot by Jeannie Moon
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Book 4: Falling for the Ranger by Kaylie Newell
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Book 5: Burning with Desire by Patricia W. Fischer
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More by Heidi Rice
Tempting the Knight
Book 1 in the Fairy Tales of New York series
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Sleepless in London
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About the Author
USA Today Bestselling and RITA-nominated author Heidi Rice is married with two sons (which gives her rather too much of an insight into the male psyche). She also works as a film journalist and was born in Notting Hill in West London (before it became as chi-chi as it is in the film starring Hugh Grant). She now lives in Islington in North London – a stone’s throw away from where they shot Four Weddings and a Funeral… (She has asked Hugh to stop stalking her, but will he listen?!)
She loves her job because it involves sitting down at her computer each day and getting swept up in a world of high emotions, sensual excitement, funny feisty women, sexy tortured men and glamorous locations where laundry doesn’t exist … Not bad, eh.
More from Heidi:
Visit her website Heidi-Rice.com
Check out her blog
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Follow her on Twiter@HeidiRomRice
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